What Can We Learn From Envy?

This past Friday I checked out Lewis Howes’, “5 Minute Friday” with guest, Glennon Doyle Melton. She shared some sensational insight on how envy can serve as our professor towards finding our purpose. We should be asking ourselves, “What makes us uncomfortable? All of our emotions are instructive. Especially the uncomfortable ones. Instead of rejecting envy, we should learn from it” says Glennon.

As Tai Lopez mentioned in a recent post of ours, “Envy is the flashlight that illuminates our inner being.” This requires us to be brutally honest with ourselves. The sooner we can come to this awareness, the better off we will be.

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

 

What Motivates Us?

Earlier this year at Nick Unsworth’s “Life On Fire” conference, Tai Lopez broke down how we can go about identifying what helps to drive and motivate us toward our purpose. “Our purpose is our end goal that we input into our GPS. However, what we should really be asking ourselves is, “What is the fuel that drives us?” says Tai.

Tai mentions that the 4 primary drivers of motivation are:

1. Money – Money driven

2. Mating – Relationship driven

3. Mastery – Status driven

4. Momentum – Freedom driven

We must ask ourselves, “Which of these four primary motivators drives us to compete? Which of these four primary motivators sparks envy toward others? In this case, envy can be viewed positively as long as it is properly harnessed. As Tai mentions, “Envy is the flashlight that illuminates our inner being.” We are motivated to attain what we envy in others.

What is my primary driver?

From as long as I can remember, I have always been driven by mastery. I always make an effort to be one of the best at what I do. For example, when I entered the 6th grade, I attended I.S. 61 on Staten Island, NY. When I found out that I was not placed in honors classes, I was not very happy to say the least. That year I worked very hard to achieve the status of being on the high-honor roll. As a result, I was moved into honors classes for my 7th grade year.

That same year, I also attended a highly selective 22-month extracurricular program designed to assist eligible NYC public school students in preparing for the Specialized High Schools Admissions Test (The Bronx High School of Science, Brooklyn Technical High School, Stuyvesant High School). Nonetheless, attending a specialized high school was never really an intention or purpose of mine. Although I did attend the program, I certainly did not maximize my potential.

As fate would have it, I ended up attending St. Peters Boys High School on Staten Island. One week into my freshmen year was September 11, 2001. One of the specialized high schools that I would have attended if admitted, Stuyvesant High School, was so close to the World Trade Center site that it was immediately evacuated and classes did not resume for weeks. In December of 2002, my parents ended up moving our family out of the city to Piscataway, NJ. The rest is history!

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

The Common Denominator of Success

As I was finishing up the miniature edition of “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens” by Sean Covey this morning (I just needed some quick inspiration), I came across a very thought provoking quote summing up Albert E.N. Gray’s years of studying successful people. It goes as follows:

“All successful people have the habit of doing the things failures don’t like to do. They [successful people] don’t like doing them necessarily either. But their disliking is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.”

After reading this I felt inclined to google Albert E.N. Gray. The first result that appeared was a PDF link to a 6 page article of his entitled, “The Common Denominator of Success.” After reading this article, it really helped me to gain more of an understanding as to what truly separates those who succeed from those who do not. Here’s a quick hint, not only do successful people do the things that “unsuccessful” people do not like to do, successful people also have a purpose strong enough to make them form the habit of doing things they don’t like in an effort to accomplish the purpose they are looking to achieve. Wow! This is timeless knowledge from 1940!

[Disclaimer]: I personally believe that “success” is relative to the beholder of it’s title. Hence, whenever the term “failure” or “unsuccessful” is mentioned, it is not to demean or patronize anyone who may take offense. Our purpose here at aloversambition.com is to publish purposeful and thought-provoking content with the aim to enlighten and inspire our readers.

 

Here are 4 main points that I extracted from Albert E.N. Gray’s 6 page article that were most relevant to myself. Hopefully we can all benefit from this in some capacity!

1. Embrace What’s Difficult:

The secret of success lies in forming the habit of doing things that unsuccessful people don’t like to do. The things that unsuccessful people don’t like to do are the very things that you and I and other human beings naturally don’t like to do. In other words, we’ve got to realize right from the start that success is something which is achieved by the minority. Therefore, it is unnatural and not to be achieved by following our natural likes and dislikes nor by being guided by our natural preferences and prejudices.

2. Focus On Accomplishing Results: 

By doing the things we don’t like to do, we can accomplish the things we want to accomplish. For example, successful people are influenced by the desire for pleasing results. Unsuccessful people are influenced by the desire for pleasing methods and are satisfied with the results obtained by doing things they like to do. Why are successful people able to do things they don’t like to do while unsuccessful people are not? Because successful people have a purpose strong enough to make them form the habit of doing things they don’t like to do in order to accomplish the purpose they want to accomplish. In other words, it’s important that we find our why. Our why is our purpose. As comedian, Michael Jr. once said, “When we know our why, our what has more impact because we’re walking in or towards our purpose.”

3. Have a Growth Adaptability Mindset:

It is easier to adjust ourselves to the hardships of a poor living than it is to adjust ourselves to the hardships of making a better one. Think of all the things we are willing to go without in order to avoid doing the things we don’t like to do. All of which seems to prove that the strength which holds us to our purpose is not our own strength but the strength of our purpose itself.

4. Form Purposeful Habits:

Every single qualification for success is acquired through habit. People form habits and habits form futures. If we do not deliberately form good habits, then unconsciously we will form bad ones. We are the kind of people we are because we have formed the habit of being that kind of person. The only way we can change is through habit. Behind every success there must be a purpose and this is what makes purpose so important to our future. It is important that we do not allow our future to solely depend on circumstances in which we have no control. Rather, our future should depend on our purpose in life.

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

Know Your Why: Michael Jr.

On February 1, 2016 one of my best friends shared this video with me on Facebook. Although I’m familiar with the concept of finding why we do what we do and the importance of knowing what our purpose is in life, I have yet to see it delivered as eloquently as how Michael Jr. presents it in this video.

Michael Jr. mentions, “When we know our why, we have options on what our what can be.” As mentioned in one of our previous posts entitled, “How Might We Discover our Purpose”, once we are able to discover, identify, and pursue our calling [“Our Why”], we are then better equipped to select and manage which assignments [“Our What”] are in our best interest in regards to achieving our ultimate success!

“When we know our why, our what has more impact because we are walking in or towards our purpose.” – Michael Jr.

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

How Might We Discover Our Passion?

Are you currently asking yourself, “How do I discover my passion?” If so, then this post is just for you. Two weeks ago, I was listening to a 7 hour business mastery course and this very same question was addressed. To spare you the 7 hours, let’s hop right into it!

1. What Are We Curious About?

We must ask ourselves, “What are we curious about?” It’s important that we make time to go out of our comfort zone to wander, explore, and discover new things. As a former record executive and the author of “The Tanning of America”, Steve Stoute says, “Without curiosity, there is no innovation.”

In order to seek purpose internally, we must be curious externally. Be a scientist, poke around, run experiments and tests. We must see what works for us and what doesn’t. It’s the only way to differentiate what we like from what we don’t like. Just because we may be “adults” certainly doesn’t mean that we can no longer explore!

2. Create a List!

Once we’ve gone through the discover phase, it’s important that we create a list of the things we actually enjoy. What interests us the most? Why? Can we invest in it as a hobby? Better yet, how can we go about turning it into something that we can do for a living? These are all essential questions that we definitely must ask ourselves.

3. Ask People What We Are Good At:

Asking people what we are good at is probably one of the best ways to identify our own personal strengths. Once we know what we are good at, it helps us to focus more on the direction most suitable for us to pursue in life. Let’s view it as helping to narrow down our road map. For some people, discovering our passion may be difficult. For others, narrowing down our options may be of more importance. Either way, once we know what we are good at and what we actually enjoy doing, we are then in a better position to discover our passion point(s).

How Did I Find My Passion?

When I was a child, I was infatuated with architecture and construction. I would always be amazed at how structures were built and developed. I loved playing with legos more than anything else. I was enamored with the idea of connecting little tiny pieces of plastic together in an effort to form a finished product. As I had grown older, I eventually gravitated over to drawing, playing sports, and creating music. Today, my creative outlet is essentially a combination of all of my childhood endeavors. Instead of connecting legos and building blocks, I connect people and build brands.

Find your PASSION! #ALOVERSAmbition

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

How Might We Discover Our Purpose?

Back in December of 2015, I listened to episode 263 of Lewis Howes’, “School of Greatness” podcast. In this particular episode, Lewis sits down with Brad Lomenick, author of “The Catalyst Leader” to discuss how to go about mastering confidence, humility, and leadership. A little less than halfway through the podcast (14:42), Lewis poses the following question to Brad, “How might we go about discovering our own unique purpose?”

Here is some very helpful insight in regards to helping us discover, identify, and pursue our own unique purpose in life:

1. Identity:

Our identity is who we are. It consists of all of the things which we cannot change. For example, we cannot change our ethnic background, our family structure, or when and where we were born.

(Ex: Hello, my name is Aquaus Kelley and I am of African-American descent. I am from Staten Island, NY and I graduated from Rutgers University with a degree in Communication).

2. Calling: 

Our calling is what we are meant to do. It is why we are here on this planet. It is our purpose or social mission. In Victor E. Frankl’s book, “A Man’s Search For Meaning” he calls this our “Will to Meaning” (Pg. 99). If we are unaware as to what our purpose may be, we may want to start with discovering our own interests and passions.

(Ex: My calling is to lead people towards becoming the best versions of themselves in an effort to set them up for personal success. Overall, my social mission is to use my influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership).

3. Assignment:

Our assignment is our current day to day role or vocation. Ideally, this should align with our calling. When our assignment does not align with our calling, it may cause Noögenic neuroses. According to Dr. Frankl, noögenic neuroses is the cause of frustration due to the misalignment of our calling (purpose) and our assignment (vocation). 

(Ex: My current assignment is that of a brand strategist, educator, and music publisher. I curate content and develop brand strategy through A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, I work with middle school students in the field of education, and I specialize in identifying talent and creating opportunities for emerging artists as a music publisher).

Think about it. How do we feel when we are in a profession that does not allow our own purpose to flourish? Once we are able to discover, identify, and pursue our calling, we are then better equipped to select and manage which assignments are best for our own ultimate success!

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

iPad Mini Courtesy of Tai Lopez

Earlier today, I received a notification from Tai Lopez’s YouTube channel in regards to his latest video upload entitled, “5 Ways Personal Branding Can Increase Trust and Credibility.” An hour or two later, I made some time to check out the video while cooking dinner and washing the dishes. To my surprise, the video was actually a live stream. I had no idea how long the stream would last. Nonetheless, I did know that whatever information was being offered, it would be extremely valuable.

I learned a lot to say the least. It also happened that one of the members on Tai’s team, Andrew Copp is from Staten Island, NY just like myself. Considering the level of admiration I have for Tai Lopez, I definitely found Andrew’s story to be very inspiring to say the least. Towards the end of the live stream, Tai and his team always run contests to give listeners and watchers opportunities to win prizes via multiple social media platforms such as Facebook, Snapchat, and Peeriscope. I have never been a huge fan of contests. However, because I just spent the last 2 hours listening and paying attention to the live stream, I thought that I might actually have a pretty solid chance at coming away with something in addition to all of the wonderful gems I had just learned.

Prior to me even knowing that there was going to be a contest taking place, I did my usual due diligence…RESEARCH. I like to get familiar with the people who I am listening to when it comes to  learning new information. When I checked out Andrew, I already knew that he was from Staten Island. I was curious to learn more. I looked into his LinkedIn and Twitter profiles and a few minutes later Andrew asked the following questions for the contest to win an iPad Mini:

  1. What was the name of the agency that I worked for when I dropped out of college?
  2. What was the first and last name of the person who hired me?

I already knew that I was equipped with everything that I needed to answer both of these questions. Sometimes it’s not about how much we know but rather it’s where we need to go to get the right information. Hence, because I just finished checking out Andrew’s LinkedIn, I had the answers right there in front of me (Answers: 1. MicroFame Media, 2. Michael Shein). Talk about taking notes! I spent 2 hours of my time investing in a free education and I also ended up coming away with an iPad Mini. Not a bad ROI. I owe it all to activating prior knowledge (research), paying attention to details (listening), and knowing how to properly utilize resources (LinkedIn).

Lesson learned? These are skills that could and should be applied to our everyday lives. Knowledge is key, knowledge is power. Let’s take action in applying and investing in the steps aimed towards helping us to achieve success. #ALOVERSAmbition

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

Time Tells The Truth: Tai Lopez

Yes…I finally have a four word answer to one of the questions I receive pretty often, “Aquaus, how are you so patient?” As my virtual mentor Tai Lopez says, “Time tells the truth.” Indeed it does!

I’ve always believed that I will find out everything that I need to know in due time. I also believe that all of the questions that I pose to myself, others, and the universe at large will always be answered when the time is right. If I don’t have an answer, the time isn’t right. However, this definitely doesn’t mean that I just sit around waiting for answers. No, no, no. In order to execute anything, we must first begin. Once we begin, the race kicks off. However, as I like to say, “Life is not a sprint, it’s a marathon.”

Patience allows us to see many things. As time elapses, we receive various indicators as to how to navigate the myriad of realms in our lives. This includes business, dating, friendships, and relationships just to name a few. When we learn how to love and embrace time, we also learn how to listen and we begin to understand how time tells us the truth. Time tells us what we deserve. We must respect it and keep it on our side. Time must not be taken for granted. When we’re patient, humble, and attentive, we position ourselves to receive what is true for us at a time when it can have the greatest impact on our lives. 

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

Take The Humble Road: Empty Your Mind

https://youtu.be/LTnSEFsInp0

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine jokingly told me that she hates when my actions are deliberately a reflection of hers. My response, “I’m like water.” She then asked me what I meant by that statement and I sent her a direct link to the source…the legend himself, Mr. Bruce Lee.

Today, as I recorded my 7 Days of Wisdom video for Episode 15, one of the discussion points I mentioned was “Staying Cool Under Pressure.” Once again, I revisited Bruce Lee’s “Empty your mind, be like water clip.” According to my knowledge, this clip originates from “The Way of the Intercepting Fist.”

This time around, in my 7 Days of Wisdom video for Episode 15, the focus of discussion was on staying cool under pressure and taking the humble road. In my experience, I personally believe that when we remain calm and tranquil as humans, we allow the emotions of others to bounce off of us as a reflection of their own actions. That reflection, whether positive or negative, then gets directed back to the owner of those emotions. When we act as a mirror, we allow people to see themselves through us. In many instances, this approach requires a ton of patience, confidence, and taking the humble road.

In author Sean Covey’s national bestseller, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens,” he gives a great example of being proactive vs reactive. Covey uses the analogy of being like soda vs being like water. He mentions, “Reactive people make choices based in impulse. They are like a can of soda. If life shakes them up a bit, the pressure builds and they suddenly explode.” On the contrary, “Proactive people make choices based on values. They think before they act. Unlike reactive people who are full of carbonation, proactive people are like water. No bubbling, no fizzing, no pressure. They are calm, cool, and in control.”

As Bruce Lee says:

“Empty your mind. Be formless. Shapeless, like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. Put it into a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or creep or drip or crash…be water my friend, be water.” – Bruce Lee

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.

12 Things We Learned From Tai Lopez on Snapchat

This morning I watched this video and I just couldn’t turn it off. In fact…I watched it 4 times. I personally find it to be very inspiring. Along with Lewis Howes and many others, Tai Lopez is at the top of my list of people I would love to meet soon!

Here are 12 Things We Learned From Tai Lopez on Snapchat:

  1. Short memory is the key to winning. You will lose but then you will forget about it.
  2. Rest more than you train.
  3. Books are the GPS for life.
  4. Master the fundamentals: Understand the language of money, networking with people, reading people, creating products, raising capital, distribution, marketing, and promotion.
  5. Don’t listen to the naysayers.
  6. Strategize and sit in a chair for at least 15 mins a day.
  7. If something you are doing is not working, move to an alternate path.
  8. Create momentum to create opportunities.
  9. Watch your downsides.
  10. Balance your discipline with enjoyment.
  11. Differentiate between insecurities around areas you can alter and ones you cannot. You can’t change your height but with hard work you can change your weight. Forget what you can’t change and focus on what you can change.
  12. Spend money and invest in books.

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(Uh • Kway • Us) Aquaus Kelley is a forward-thinking Brand Strategist, Educator, and Music Publisher. As the Founder of A Lovers Ambition Lifestyle Group, he specializes in identifying talent and creating opportunities for brand development, exposure, and growth. Aquaus has worked with companies and organizations such as Cornerstone Agency, City Year Miami, Universal Music Group, and W Hotels. He is extremely passionate about helping companies adapt to culture and building value between brands and their consumers centered around love. His ultimate mission is to use his influence to project positivity across the globe and invest in the collective future of society through the arts, education, entertainment, and leadership.